Gossip Girl 3.10 “The Last Days of Disco Stick” (aka The Gagaesque Modality)

If we acknowledge that the supreme strength of the television medium is the ability to construct longer and more complex narratives than would be possible in a shorter form, then a plotline like this is an almost-criminal misuse of the form.

China: America’s New BFF

Obama’s town hall in Shanghai pleased me greatly. His silver tongue was on full display in appeasing the Chinese with conciliatory praise and refined humility. Humility, a word I would rarely associate with American politicians, is an extremely important in Asian cultures. He was not forceful, he was not arrogant, and he was the first to point out America’s hypocrisies. I think that this was something the Chinese wanted and needed to hear from an American leader.

Gossip Girl 3.06 “Enough About Eve” (aka Social Identity Theory)

Are we supposed to sympathize with the Van Der Bilts because they are Democrats and the Buckleys are Republicans? We’ve already seen that the Van Der Bilts are just as controlling, manipulative, and desirous of power; they only reinforce that image in this episode. (For a moment, I almost though that Gossip Girl was actually engaging in political commentary.)

A Capella

I’ve never understood a capella. In college I went to a few concerts and bought two CDs from one of the myriad groups on campus. Even though I enjoyed it, the need to render Radiohead and Weezer into a compressed arrangement of voices always puzzled me. It was like reading the novelization of a movie, or, perhaps more precisely, watching a low-quality pirated copy of a movie instead of going to the theater. But I thought that probably it was just me, that I didn’t understand the art form.

So when I sat down to watch Voces8, an acclaimed English octet, at the National Center for the Performing Arts, I expected insight. I thought that a capella performed by professionals would be qualitatively different from those Friday nights on the quad. And it was, in terms of quality and song choice (less pop, more English ballads), but in the end it was just eight people singing, making sounds, and occasionally snapping to the beat. But if I thought I was confused, it seemed that most of the audience was worse off.

The Amazing And Spectacular Antics of the Roundeye

Imagine, if you will, flipping through channels and coming to a rest on this: a Chinese, an Arab, and an African man are facing off in a contest of English. The next question: “A _____ by any other name would smell as sweet?” *BZZT* “Frower!” says the Chinese guy. The audience groans in disappointment. Next up: the talent portion. The African announces proudly that he will sing the classic American ballad, “Love me Tender” by Elvis Presley. Thunderous applause follows his rendition, despite being slightly off-key. The Chinese follows up with an enthusiastic, if not entirely professional, banjo ditty. Not to be outdone, the Arab launches into a comedic routine with a passable southern accent, featuring words like “varmint” and “hightail.” The camera pans to a packed audience of white faces, grinning broadly and applauding madly.

Does this show sound surreal to you? Well, frequently in the evening, that’s exactly the kind of show that’s on prime-time Chinese television—foreigners paraded on television for all to watch, showing off their skills in Chinese.

Who Owns the Paracel Islands?

In the South China Sea there are a group of tiny, uninhabited islands known to the western world as the Paracel Islands (Quan Dao Hoang Sa in Vietnamese and Xisha Qundao in Chinese). The archipelago lies roughly 200 miles from the nearest mainland shore, equidistant from Vietnamese and Chinese coastlines, and is delineated into two groups: the Amphitrite group in the northeast and the Crescent group in the southwest. In total the geographic region consists of over thirty islets, sandbanks, and reefs.

Uighurs and Guantanamo

Four Uighur detainees from Guantanamo Bay who were cleared for release will not be moving to America. Although a large Uighur community in Northern Virginia has offered to accept the former detainees, elected officials from Virginia refused to allow the Uighurs to resettle in Northern Virginia.

The Premier in Bermuda, a British protectorate, agreed to accept the Uighurs without consulting the Foreign Ministry in the U.K. This unilateral move led to large protests across the island calling for his resignation that coincided with the arrival of the Uighurs. 13 other Uighurs have been moved to Palau. None of the detainees held at Guantanamo Bay who have been cleared of the charges against them has been released into the United States.

I Know You Aren’t, But What Am I?

On June 3, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton issued a message to the Chinese government, asking them to remember and recant on the 20th anniversary of the events at Tiananmen Square, saying: “A China that has made enormous progress economically, and that is emerging to take its rightful place in global leadership, should examine openly the darker events of its past and provide a public accounting of those killed, detained or missing, both to learn and to heal.” Toward the end of the memorandum she dangerously advised: “This anniversary provides an opportunity for Chinese authorities to release from prison all those still serving sentences in connection with the events surrounding June 4, 1989. We urge China to cease the harassment of participants in the demonstrations and begin dialogue with the family members of victims, including the Tiananmen Mothers.”

Writer’s Block

There is a Chinese idiom about a man who buried a sum of silver underground and, worried that passersby would find it, placed a sign next to the plot that read “ci di wu yin san bai liang,” or “There is not 300 liang of silver here.” Needless to say, the next day his silver was gone.

I wonder if the censorship bureau understands this parable because one thing everyone in China should know by now is that if you ever come across a website that terminates your Internet connection, start digging.

Working YouTube Proxy

For anyone that remembers, YouTube was blocked in late March and, sadly, shows no sign of returning. Luckily, a friend linked me a working proxy for the site: http://www.ensa.info/. Usually proxies can’t stream videos but this site uses their own player. It’s not perfect, and there are spasms of pop-ups but it’s something.